A New Day in New York

It's a new day in New York -- and across the country.

Twice as many Americans now live in states where marriage parity for all is the law than was the case just a few days ago. Twice as many gay and lesbian American families now have a new option to select: That of seeing their commitment respected, protected, and prized in the same way that heterosexuals have long taken as their due.

It's a day that was destined to dawn, as the light of understanding traverses our American continent and sexual minorities increasingly come out of the closet, and are increasingly accepted in turn. But it's a day still dawning, a day still fringed with night.

The anti-gay crowd is not going to take our victory with a nod and a smile. The bullies at the laughably misnamed National Organization for Marriage have already reiterated their threats to go after New York state lawmakers who supported marriage equality.

But bullies only get away with their antics for as long as their victims consent to be victims. When Albany last took up marriage equality, in 2009, not a single Republican in the New York State Senate stood up for same-sex families, and a number of Democrats who had paid lip service to the notion of marriage parity voted against it. This time was different: This time there was Republican support, and though slight, it was crucial; it made the difference. The grip of fear and the sway of intimidation that anti-gay groups have long had over lawmakers are weakening: The very fact that New York arrived at marriage equality though the legislative process, and not the courts, is proof of that.

So is the courage of those who braved belligerence and threats. The lawmakers who stood up and made marriage equality possible in New York did so despite ugly, brutish vows of retaliation not only from NOM, but also from the state's Conservative Party.

NOM has already promised to make a Wisconsin ballot initiative on the rights of gay and lesbian families a priority next year. The group cited the Wisconsin vote in their comments on New York's new marriage law, which was telling: It was their trash-the-house response to the news that freedom for America's gay and lesbian families has just taken a major step forward. But those who believe in the national credo of "liberty and justice for all" can, and must, ensure that the threats NOM and others have made against those who refused to bow to their attempt at intimidation remain empty.

GLBT civil rights equality has always been a dance of two steps forward and one, two, or even three steps back. But what was once a murmured waltz of equality is now becoming a rave: The music of our liberation grows thunderous and joyful. We should celebrate the victory in New York, but that celebration should be tempered with the knowledge that our work is far from done.

Just outside the circle of light, prowling in the darkness, are those determined to live in fear and inflict lifetimes of fear on others. They don't have to be our enemies. They could join the celebration if only they set that devotion to fear aside. It's our duty always to be ready to resist encroachments on our civil and human rights, but it's also our duty -- to our opponents as well as to ourselves -- to be just as ready with a hand of greeting.

NOM and others are looking even now to take our victories away from us, just as they have been so long dedicated themselves to harming and depriving our families. They have succeeded in the past, but they will only continue to succeed as long as we let them.

The matter of whether this new day endures, and how bright it grows, is a matter of how much we wish to dwell in its sunlight. Those who see with open and unbiased eyes the swell of joy that's even now sweeping across New York, and the nation as a whole, will see not the capering of vandals triumphant at pulling down a sacred institution, but rather the dance of families too long denied, and now delighted. The sheer radiance of our joy will speak to those who are willing to step outside the anti-gay echo chamber and listen.

For those who continue to target our families, however, a different testimony is in order: We will no longer let you feed our homes, our spouses, and our children to your political ambitions. We will no longer be the objects of your derision or your dread-driven fantasies of perversion and doom.

This day is ours to celebrate -- and to defend.