Out with Dr. Bill: Caftans, San Diego Pride, and Remembering Friends

My recent travels across the country over the past few weeks have kept me from writing my column. What better way to dive back into sharing my adventures than with the first-ever Cherry Grove Mrs. Roper Caftan Gathering?

This delightful theme party, hosted by nightlife impresario Daniel Nardicio and our friends at the Ice Palace in Cherry Grove, was inspired by one of my favorite sitcoms from the late 1970s and early 1980s, "Three's Company".

For those who might not know this groundbreaking comedy, the show follows the hilarious antics of Jack Tripper, Chrissy Snow, and Janet Wood as they navigate the challenges of living together. The twist? Jack, a Navy Veteran and culinary student, must pretend to be gay so he can live with the two women.

This setup creates endless humor, misunderstandings, and sharp societal commentary; back in its day, the idea of two women and a man living together was considered both scandalous and risky. And as a gay boy and the son of a Navy veteran, I found it ironic that Jack's character had to play gay in this scenario.

My entire family watched the show together, and most fascinating to me was that Jack was my dad's favorite character!

But the character who always stole the show for me was the quirky and vibrant landlord, Mrs. Roper. Her colorful caftans and chunky jewelry were iconic.

Helen Roper, brought to life by the late Audra Lindley, was the lovable, progressive character living below the main trio. I fondly remember her trying to spark romance with her husband, Stanley Roper, played by Norman Fell. Her constant frustration in their relationship, often humorously focused on their bedroom, added a special comedic flair.

The party kicked off in the Pines with cocktails at James and David's place, where we donned our best "Helen" outfits before heading to Cherry Grove.

Picture a hundred Mrs. Ropers trekking the beach, taking water taxis, and navigating through the Meat Rack to reach the Ice Palace.

Each participant in full Mrs. Roper attire prompted a $10 donation from the Ice Palace to the Dunes Fund, which helps preserve Cherry Grove's natural beauty.

Dr. Ruth: Our Neighbor, Our Inspiration, Our Friend

I was heartbroken to learn this month that my friend, Dr. Ruth, our former neighbor when we lived in Midtown, passed away on July 12th.

Dr. Ruth was an incredible woman who broke barriers as a pioneering sex therapist and media personality, helping countless people talk about their sexuality with humor and understanding.

I always loved her off-the-cuff advice and the positive energy she brought to our first home in New York City. Her warmth and wisdom touched our lives deeply, and I'll always cherish the memories we shared.

She will be greatly missed.

Lupita's Farewell: From News to Drag During My Desert Stopover

From Fire Island to the Sonoran Desert, I joined the farewell celebration for my dear friend and longtime News 4 Tucson veteran, Lupita Murillo, at Brother John's in Tucson.

Growing up watching Lupita on KVOA, I never imagined she would become such a close friend. Her crime reporting has left a lasting impression on the Tucson community where I was raised.

Over her 46 years at the station, Lupita has covered stories ranging from local events and community issues to major national headlines. Her contributions extend beyond the newsroom, driven by a genuine passion for helping others.

She has been deeply involved in community organizations and charitable causes.

Lupita's dedication to advocacy and her support for local nonprofits is truly inspiring. I've walked alongside her in AIDS Walks, cheered her on as she emceed auctions for the Southern Arizona AIDS Foundation (SAAF) and the Tucson Interfaith HIV/AIDS Network (TIHAN), and partnered with her in supporting the Susan G. Komen organization for breast cancer awareness.

Her compassion and leadership have profoundly impacted the Tucson community, and I am grateful to call her a dear friend.

Following Lupita's going away party, I joined some friends at the Southwest's premier gay bar and dance club, IBT's Bar + Food, to enjoy their weekly "Flawless Fridays" drag show.

Along with the local favorites like our fabulous host, China, and the incredible Kriis Dikay, I was thrilled to catch up with two of my New York City queens, Erotica and Trouble. It's always a pleasure to see NYC's finest performers shine in the desert.

From Stonewall to San Diego: Pride in Full Color

During our visit to the West Coast, we had the opportunity to experience the San Diego Pride Festival and Parade, the city's largest two-day event celebrating LGBTQ entertainment, interactive exhibits, cultural presentations, and community resources.

The event was originally produced in 1974 as a sponsored program of The Center for Social Services to commemorate the 1969 Stonewall Rebellion on New York's Christopher Street.

The festival is one of the most vibrant and well-attended pride celebrations I've ever experienced, second only to New York City.

The festivities kicked off with a colorful Pride Parade winding through the heart of San Diego, featuring an array of floats, marching bands, community groups, and lots of colorful characters and–shirtless–locals.

Although a fraction of the size of our New York Pride, thousands of spectators lined the streets, waving rainbow flags and cheering on the participants, creating an atmosphere of joy and solidarity.

After the parade, we headed to Balboa Park for the Pride Festival. The historic park was transformed into a vibrant gathering space with live music, performances, art exhibits, and food vendors.

Various booths provided information about LGBTQ+ rights, health services, and local non-profits, offering resources and support to the community.

Many thanks to Steve and Ronnie for hosting us at their gorgeous apartment in the sky, located on the west side of Balboa Park and directly across from the Pride Festival.

Our bedrooms faced the park, where the festival was being held. We were so close that we could feel the vibrations from the multiple bands playing on the five different stages.

Wrapping Up on Fire Island: Weeks of Celebration and Support

Immigration Equality

We once again hosted Immigration Equality at our Fire Island home. This year's theme was Liberation: Fire Island 2024 and once again included the generous support of Boxers NYC, who donated liquor and provided scantily dressed bartenders.

Thank you to board member Philip McCarthy and to our fellow co-hosts, Matthew Simonetti, Christopher Rawlins, Rick Bingham, and my beloved Eric Baker for coordinating all the details that made this fundraiser to support LGBTQ refugees a huge success.

Lambda Legal

Eric and I were once again on the host committee for the annual Lambda Legal in the Pines, the longest-running LGBTQ+ fundraiser in our community. What makes the Fire Island celebration so special is that the very idea of creating Lambda Legal was originally floated during a conversation around a pool in Fire Island Pines in the early 1970s.

In 1978, after the organization began to grow in strength and find its institutional footing, the annual celebration in the Pines became a crucial fundraising event for our community.

Many thanks to the event co-chairs Todd Sears; James Dale and his partner, David Lam; and Andrew and Isaac Mitchell-Namdar for stepping up and ensuring that this year was a record-breaking fundraising weekend.

James and David kicked off the weekend by hosting a lovely, well-attended pre-Tea fête for the host committee, major donors, and friends of Lambda Legal the night before the big event.

The night was particularly special because I had an opportunity to catch up with so many longtime friends while still meeting a whole array of new folks who reflected Eric's and my passion for this important organization and the work that they do.

The main event itself took place at Todd's beautiful home on the east end of the island the following afternoon and featured delicious food, provided both days by Chef Diane Douglaston and staff, a full-service, women-owned catering company based in Sayville, New York, great music, impactful speeches, and lots of scantily clad guests.

These events are vital to the fabric and resilience of our community. In 2023, 510 anti-LGBTQ+ bills were introduced, with 75 becoming law, marking a challenging year. The situation in 2024 appears even more concerning, with 471 anti-LGBTQ+ bills already introduced in 40 state legislatures. Now more than ever, we need to step up and support groups like Lambda Legal that are at the front line of the fight for dignity, equality, and justice for LGBTQ+ individuals.

Reflecting on my last couple of weeks, from the kitschy Mrs. Roper Caftan Party to the poignant farewells and pride celebrations, I'm reminded of the sheer power of community and solidarity.

Honoring trailblazers like Dr. Ruth and Lupita Murillo and supporting causes like Immigration Equality and Lambda Legal highlights our commitment to inclusion and equality.

Despite ongoing challenges, our collective actions and joyful gatherings affirm that we are stronger together.

Here's to continuing the fight for justice and celebrating the diversity that enriches our lives!